I know, I know. We all play Coming Out On Top for the hot guys Mark can date. Hey, I play it for that too. Despite not being in the spotlight our sistren are critical to the story. Even if the game is not about their story, we call tell that they have a life of their own. The exist in the background, driving and shaping the plot along, antagonizing or helping Mark, providing comic relief, and all around helping enliven the Orlinverse (that's the fancy name I came up for the universe COOT is set in). Let's get to it:
Amos' little shih-poo starts the list. The poor little bitch was born without the use of her hind legs and uses a wheelchair to move. Inseparable from her owner, Dulcie also holds the distinction of being the only other pet in the game besides Slurpy.
These two college girls frenemies are encountered during a frat party on Ian's route. Notoriously hard to impress, the punny named duo (a pun on holy moly, if you're wondering) end up being the catalyst for Mark and Ian's first kiss.
The only female member of Jed's four piece punk band, the Dirty Loofahs grabs the eight spot on the list. By far the least crazy member of the band, Jade provides a much necessary cool-headedness to counter Jed and Vince's constant fighting.
This mean girl rules the tutoring assignments to the jocks with an iron fist and does all in her power to get Brad for her own. Many COOT players can relate.
All this little spoiled princess wants to do is party in the club and flirt with cute guys! UGH! Is that too much to ask? Encountered on Phil's route, this sheltered girl lacks a little understanding of how the world works and often comes off as rude, but she has her heart in the right place.
Ian's on-again, off-again girlfriend takes a hold of the fourth place. A very sexually liberated person. She seems to have figured Ian and Mark's feeling for each other before they even do and isn't even mad abou it. What a gal.
Looking just as cool as any member of the Dirty Loofahs, Sylvia is quite a foil to her brother. Jed's dotting older sister introduction to Mark is sort of an bizarro-Jed scenario. Called Sylv by those intimate, she constantly worries about whatever mess her brother is in and wishes he would lay off of the fuck buddies. Sylv is big-hearted enough to get over her first impression of Mark to ask if he knows her brother's whereabouts. And even apologize for her rude behavior. A great big sis.
It might seem embarrassing, but since the very early stages of the game's development, when the characters from Alex's route were featured prominently on the game's promo images, I thought Edwina was a guy. I bought the game thinking "that's the one I'll romance first" and had my heart shattered when I found out he was a she. Thank God, Ian was there to console me.
Who else but the Penster? Penny is not only a savvy coder, she is funny, a loyal friend, an entrepreneur and, more importantly, a match for Mark and Ian's craziness. Sure, the angle to her apps may not be clear at first or they might not work properly, but just like the man who inspired her last name Penny is destined to success.
In a way Penny is the ultimate fag hag, having created, Brofinder, the biggest gay online dating app of the Orlinverse.
Queen Penny is the best girl in Coming Out On Top!